Posted in FEATURE ON March 05, 2020

I have always considered myself to be an individual well educated on the topic of female pleasure and health. From reading Dolly Magazine’s sealed section during my teen years to then graduating to research projects such as OMGyes in adulthood, I would have confidently claimed I was well-informed.

Masterfully and humorously written by Emily Nagoski who holds a PhD in health behaviour and a doctoral concentration in human sexuality and is Smith College’s director of Wellness Education and women’s sexuality lecturer, Come as You Are has revolutionised my understanding of female sexuality, desire and anatomy.

Did you know that sex drive is a myth and that spontaneous desire is not universally experienced? Or that according to the latest research, it is only 10% of the time that women’s genital response parallels their mental arousal. I certainly didn’t.

Come as You Are eloquently and engagingly discredits countless toxic myths of female anatomy and pleasure through science, the latest research and the careful dismantling of a ‘sex-negative’ culture. The book is divided into four sections, ‘the (not-so-basic) basics’, ‘sex in context’, ‘sex in action’ and ‘ecstasy for everybody’, each of which offers many valuable lessons. The most important lesson Nagoski imparts is that you are normal. Your body, the way you experience desire, the context most conducive to your arousal and so forth, are all normal.

If your arousal or sexual response has disappeared, if you want to better understand the mental and physical mechanisms that can either prohibit or enhance pleasure and orgasm, or if there are any unanswered questions you have about the female body and sexuality – this is the book for you.

Read this book for yourself, then pass it on to friends, sisters, cousins, daughters and mothers. Knowledge is power and where better to start than having a complete understanding of one’s sexuality?

To read Come as You Are for yourself, click here.